REVIEW: Turkey, Stuffing & Bacon by Waitrose (2017)

£3.20 – Turkey breast, pork and chestnut stuffing, cranberry, port and orange chutney with mayonnaise, smoked bacon and spinach in sliced malted bread.

Whoa, where have I been? How have you, my sandwich review addicted wastrels, coped without me for two whole days? Well let me get my excuses in first. On Tuesday I was travelling over lunch time, and although I did make the effort and go into a Greggs, Cafe Nero and Starbucks, none of them had a Christmas sandwich that didn’t require toasting and as I was a) in a rush and b) getting on the tube for an hour, so that didn’t work for me. Then yesterday it was raining and I simply couldn’t be bothered. How about that then?

But today my beautiful little followers, I have produced the goods! I went for short run to Waitrose, and that shit is uphill the whole way so I  think I have paid my penance for the lack of updates. I know, I’m a hero but please hold your admiration because, like all heroes nowadays, I could be outed as a nonce or sex pest at any moment.

So have Waitrose done what every other shop has done and brought out exactly the same sandwich? Yes. Sure, they may have changed the order of some the ingredients, but it is the same. The price is the same. Even the box is identical! Has this sandwich been sitting there for a whole year? I never go to Waitrose (man of the people) so there is a good chance it has. And yeah it’s still great, one of the best on the list, but why am I still doing this? Can I stop please?

COMING TOMORROW: Either the local Greggs or M&S and the haunting possibility of being hugged by a stranger.

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